Gloomy Day in South Bend

I am thankful for:

- bible studies that point me to Jesus and His word
- pedicures with pink toenail polish
- Panera bread
- people that have a heart for college students too!

That's all for now...

Things I'm Thankful For:
(p.s. my friend suzanne suggested making these lists when i'm not feeling thankful)

- an evening of laughing with my friends
- a cute new black skirt
- random house sitting jobs and old dogs named Gloria
- a huge one time gift
- passing out boxes to hungry families

Jesus, reign in my heart. Help me to know your face more!

My friend Elisabeth introduced me to a song. We were both kind of in the same spot this week as we were concentrating more on raising support than our relationship with Jesus.

Here is part of "Wedding Dress" by Derek Webb. You should check it out.

..."I am so easily satisfied
by the call of lovers so less wild
That I would take a little cash
Over your very flesh and blood"

I'm doing much better this afternoon. I'm back on track. God's face--that is what I am seeking and all the other things are just not as important.

LIFE

Life is so crazy these days. I feel like I'm learning new things about Jesus all the time and I don't always believe that I'm open to really seeing His character and the things he has for me. I mean, I say I want to see God work in my life but when it comes down to it, I don't like change.

For example, this week I'm babysitting and 8 and 9 year old. I'm not saying this to solicit my new trade. I actually think that I'm not that good at it. At the core, I'm a very selfish person that likes things my way. Now I'm am being called to be selfless and not have my priorities or my expectations met. Don't get me wrong, I love the kids and it's good for me to experience what so many people are doing around me. I just didn't think I would be seeing my nasty sin as much as I am.

Needless to say, I'm still raising support. And it has it's ups and downs. I don't doubt the call but am weary in the process. Thanks for praying for me.

I'm reading this book called "The Life You've Always Wanted" by John Ortberg. I think he is one of my favorite authors. He writes in a very frank and convicting manner that changes my life. Last night I was finishing up the chapter called "The Unhurried Life" and I just wanted to share a couple of thoughts with you because I am guilty of running through life. Today I was convicted by what I could be missing.

"The truth is, as much as we complain about it, we are drawn to hurry. It makes us feel important. It keeps the adrenaline pumping. It means we don't have to look too closely at the heart or life. It keeps us from feling our loneliness."

"American society is filled with ideas and values and pressures and temptations about success and securty and comfort and happiness that we will not even notice unless we withdraw on occaision."

Hope this speaks to you in the same way it spoke to my heart.

Love you all.

Freedom Writers

My sister and I went to go see Freedom Writers this weekend. I thought it was going to be "Dangerous Minds" revisited but it was so much different. Erin Gruwell inspired classmates to abandon old beliefs set up by their families to unite in one class. I loved it. My sister and my mom are both teachers and I'm sure it was inspirational to Amy but for me it challenged me to do my job better. The reason I stepped into college ministry was because my own life was transformed by the Gospel in college. I'm not the same. This movie reminded me how sweet life change is and how blessed I am to be a part of it. Go see it...I think you'll love it. We, as Believers, have the power through the holy spirit to change lives. Let's do this together.

Colorado...

I'm back in Colorado for our annual student and staff conference. It's fun to come back here and be reminded of what the Lord has done in my life here in this hotel. When I first attended the Denver Christmas Conference (DCC), I was a senior in college--not sure where the Lord was calling me. Now, I'm here in the middle of raising funds to impact student's lives the same way that Jesus used staff here to change my life. It's good to be in a familiar place with people that know me well.

I was talking to my friend Suz the other day about the restlessness that I feel sometimes in this season of life. We talked about how different it is to live in authentic real community. She told me this quote from a friend, "Once you have lived in a community that takes steps of faith together, you'll never feel at home anywhere else." And I have been thinking about this a lot and realized, my heart longs for a community of peers that knows me well. I can't wait for heaven.

Tough Days

Things are weird lately in my little head. I went to mexico for a conference and a wedding. I think that was the beginning of hard stuff. Then I found out that my grandpa passed away so I flew home early for the funeral which was right before Christmas. Since Mexico I feel like I am having an out of body experience.

Please pray:
-that I would cling to Jesus for understanding
-that I would get back in a routine with my life
-that support raising would be good and encouraging

Thanks so much.

Fun Times from Turkey Day

Thanksgiving was great...I didn't come home last year so it I forgot how fun it is to sit around with my extended family and crack up. Some highlights of the day included:
- Kim encouraging Ben and Alec to spit ice cubes on the table. One landed in Grandma's lap.
- Pumpkin Bowling in the back yard.
- The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade
- My mom's Pumpkin Dip
- Playing Zigity with Kim and Heather
- Seeing Brady crack up in his Turkey Outfit.

I've included a picture of Roger with Ben and Alec. How cute are these boys?

God's Work in a Year

I was reminded today of the fierce work that God faithfully did in my life in the last year. I can't go into tons of details but this week last year was one of the hardest times in my life. I watched as the Lord stripped many things away from me so that I could have the option of taking an amazing journey with him of restoration and healing. I am so grateful for the way Jesus has used women in my life to grow and change me and I am so thankful for his commitment to my growth.

What a thing to be thankful for!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone.

Ryan's Art Show

A couple of weeks ago, my brother had a steel piece in an art show. It was a big to do in our family and in the art show business as well. I just wanted to let you know how proud I am of this guy. Here's a pic of Ryan with his piece.

25 Years Old!

This past weekend, I turned 25 years old. I love birthdays. I love being surrounded by people that care so much for you. I was reminded and refreshed in big ways and I am so grateful for that. It's hard to sometimes to connect with others when I am busy working, raising support, meeting with small groups and working on my New Testament class so it was good to have community all weekend.

I was also reminded of God's sovereign plan for my life. I love the thought that I am right on track. That God knew before the beginning of time that I would be sitting here in South Bend on my 25th Birthday with my family instead of in Mexico with my stellar team. It wasn't news to Him.

He continues to bless, stretch and grow me in this process. Thank you for walking with me, praying for me and encouraging me by just being in the race with me.

Sibling Fun Part One

My sister ran her marathon on Sunday in Chicago. I'm so proud of her. So much of what I'm doing right now with support reminds me of a marathon. I'm recruiting people to stand on the curb of my journey and go crazy as I barely plow through. Here's a picture when I jumped in and ran with her. There will be other fun pictures of this past weekend's activities to come as well.

Fall Weather and Gray Skies

Above is a picture of me at work at the podiatrist. Behind me is Steph and Amber. They work there as well. I work here part time while raising support.

Well, I just got back from Hillsdale, MI where I got to spend some quality time with friends from the summer. How encouraging it was to be with people that God has planted in them a similar heart to me.

I have really struggled with this issue--being around people that get me, my vision, and how hard it is at times to continuously ask people to be a part of this with me. Don't get me wrong, I am completely sold out to reaching college students for Christ. Sometimes, it's just hard doing it alone. But altogether I'm so thankful for the time here. I thank Jesus for my parents and how they love me and take care of me. I praise God that they care enough to ask about raising support and my heart.

Golf, Outings, Brats and Carts

Today I attended and volunteered at my first golf outing. I can go as far as to say that this was my first time even on a course. Tee time was at 8 a.m so that meant that I arrived around 7:00 to help with set up.

My job was to stand on the 5th hole with a lady and have the participants attempt to hit marshmellows the farthest with their clubs. It was interesting and definetly worth the time.

I still don't know much about the sport or why it is so fascinating and am confused why anyone in their right mind would watch it on TV regardless of a guy named Tiger playing.

My favorite part by far was the golf cart and when a guy started yelling at his team to give me money because I'm a missionary. These poor guys reluctantly opened their wallets and started shuffling it out... not the best support raising technique but it kept me laughing for awhile longer.

Still In Indiana

Things have been a roller coaster this last week. I've gone through some times of really doubting that the Lord is going to raise my support. It's funny--I don't doubt my call just the timing of it. I'm learning to be thankful in everything and trusting the Lord for His timing. God certainly has provided new people with the desire to invest in college students with me. I'm so grateful for them.

This week was my mom and Amy's Birtdays. My stepdad got my mom a new laptop. This is a big step for the Bastine/Horein household given that our last family computer was purchased in 1996. My mom is still getting used to the new guy. We are at Panera now mooching off free internet. You have heard me complain in the past about the lack of internet connection and cell phone coverage at my house. Well the Fam and I were talking about getting high speed internet (wireless)at the house so I made some calls... the services are not even available in our area! Go figure... love the sticks of Indiana.

Emily's Newest Man

Here he is in all of his little cuteness. I know awhile ago I mentioned that on June 18, I became an aunt. Well I wasn't joking. This is Brady Horein. My stepbrother and sister in law are the parents and last week I got to hang out with this cutie two days. This kid kind of brings a little joy to my life.

My team is in Mexico City now. They got in yesterday amidst all the crazy presidential stuff. I'm still working on support. Pray that the Lord would encourage me again... I feel like I ask him this all the time- to remind me of what He has called me to and that it takes a little perseverance.

Colorado

Well.. I have returned to Colorado for STINT briefing for the next week. I'm excited but it is kind of weird not going to Greeley with the staff team. Lots of changes are happening in my heart and mind. Yesterday was crazy. Not only it was the longest day of my life but it's not everyday that you burst into tears multiple times at the Midway Airport. I think my heart is just unsettled and after spending some time with Jesus, I just desire His presence. What a good thing to desire huh? I feel like the last couple of weeks that I have abandoned my first love- God Himself. Yesterday was good to set me back on track. I'll update later in the week.

Reality

It's setting in. I have realized that raising support may take longer than I think. Honestly, I don't like the in between time like this. I want to be in Mexico. I'm built for ministry and sometimes it's hard to see where Jesus is while I wait and trust for Him to work. It's a good spot to be in--just another opportunity to trust Jesus.

When I step back and look at my experience of building my team thus far I am so encouraged. I'm so thankful for my team and how they love and take care of me. I sit here and know that the Lord has strategically placed them around me so I wouldn't be here alone.

Last night at church we talked about how we all have a position on the team. Whatever position it is, we need the other parts to operate the way God intented. The big question is: "Am I ready for the game?" Are my shoes on? Am I ready for the big game?

Pray with me as I prepare and seek the Lord to get me ready.

Back Home Again...

In Indiana.

I drive around here and think so many different things. I'm reminded of my past and how I used to deal with life. I think through where God is pushing me and what He's asks me to leave behind. All this to say--I'm still adjusting to being back.

I'm so grateful for my family. I spent some time in Indy last week reconnecting with friends and family then spent the weekend at my Aunt and Uncles for the funnest weekend of the year. The Hendricks Family Reunion. This year, I invited my 3rd cousin Larry. He has been a part of my ministry and I never met him so I thought this was my year to build the relationship. I had such a good time with all of them.

I'm reminded today to continue to be thankful for where God has me and the people he has strategically placed around me. I want my life to count for something more and today matters for eternity.