I am in a mourning period friends. I have come to the conclusion lately that I am not as young as I think I am. My friend Cornelia warned me about this. She says that those who work with college students one day come to the realization that the students stay the same age and we just keep getting older.
This August marks 5 years in Mexico. Lots of things have changed--the team(s), the roommates, the safety of the city, etc. My first couple of years here I was all over the place. I have awesome memories of how we went salsa dancing, to soccer games with millions of people and for late night tacos. We went on spontaneous trips to other cities and had a great time.
I'm not as young as I once was friends. I'm 30 now. And I am not saying I am old. I am just not an adolescent anymore. I have begun to consider the consequences of late nights and larger crowds. I think this has happened for a couple of reasons.
1. I married the safety captain. Gabo is all about never taking a necessary risk in life (I can see a fist pump in the air from Cathie Horein now). He lives his life like that and he is even more concerned about his gringa wife and her blonde hair and blue eyes.
2. I get tired more easily and the people annoy me. Standing all day in a hot place makes me want to claw my eyes out. I have less of a "it's worth it attitude". It's not worth it if it means tired feet, sunburn or me being hungry or getting a parasite. I think my priorities have changed.
3. I blame my stage of life. This could coincide a little bit with #1 but let me explain. You see I am not a college student anymore. I am not a mom either but I am an adult and logical reasoning and future planning does come into play for me. I want this NOT to be true but I know it is. I live in denial about #3.
This all came about because I was supposed to go to a see a certain teen pop star on Monday.
I had planned to go the day of and stand in the crowd of 200,000 + people and wait for him... in the heat with no umbrella, then rain and then the concert.
But I wussed out. I considered the bathroom situation, I wasn't feeling so good and would need to frequent it. I considered the water and then needing a bathroom more. I considered all the pushy teenage girls that thought Justin was their boyfriend. I considered coming home late and a sunburn and then getting wet. And I just lost my steam. I couldn't do it.
I feel like missing JB was an end of an era for me. I'm not saying that I am never going to a concert again but I feel like my standards and needs have changed. On June 11, 2012, Emily became more high maintenance. I was really disappointed in myself.
So long Youthful Emily. It was fun knowing you. I will be at home weighing my options and consequences. I think I have just become even more realistic.